In honour of tomorrow’s special day—It’s my birthday—I wanted to give you all a really special post. But I couldn’t come up with anything special.

30 Things I’ve Learned in 30 Years

651 words about life — 22:00 · 15th Jun 2014

Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours. Ayn Rand

Tomorrow I will officially be 30 years old. Unofficially I’ve been 30 for the past 6 months already because I started embracing ageing early this year, calling myself a “white guy in my mid-thirties” since January, much to my wife’s dismay.

“You’re not 30 yet”, she would say.

And how right she has been, until tomorrow.

Tomorrow, the day of reckoning is finally upon me, I can finally claim my rightful title as a “white guy in his mid-thirties”.

Tomorrow I’ll be 30 and I couldn’t be happier. No, really. That’s why I’ve embraced earlier than I needed to.

I’m happy with where I am in life, who I’m with and where things are going. Could some things be different? Sure, of course—I wouldn’t be me, if I wasn’t looking towards the future but equally much, things are good right now and I want to enjoy that.

Tomorrow I will have managed to survive for 30 years, which looking back at some of the stupid things I’ve done, is quite an accomplishment.

Don’t worry though, this isn’t a post about looking back at things that have been, nor is it about looking forward to the things that, may or may not, be. No, instead I want to share with you all the things I’ve learned in my 30 years of living.

Because who doesn’t love unsolicited advice from a stranger on the internet?

Especially strangers who are willing to share images like this one.

Child’s drawing of Buzz Lightyear, saying “I am Buzz Lightyear, I cum in pies”
The importance of correct spelling.

I’m also the stranger who could only come up with 16 things, rather than 30 things.

Clearly I haven’t learned as much as I would like to. Which is, sort of, fine I suppose since I really enjoy learning new things anyway and maybe it’s a healthy sign, indicating that my brain hasn’t withered away completely. At least, not just yet.

Anyway, here we go:

  1. Forgive your parents for whatever mistakes you think they made. They were just trying their best, regardless of the result.
  2. Sometimes it’s nice to just sit and stare into a wall surrounded by silence.
  3. Porridge for breakfast is awesome.
  4. The meaning of life is to find meaning. Yours is probably not the same as mine.
  5. Learning new things is like juice for the soul.
  6. No one ever lied on their deathbed wishing they had spent more time at the office.
  7. Surround yourself with people who challenge you intellectually, emotionally and physically.
  8. Care.
  9. Whenever people remind you to appreciate the little things, they’re reminding themselves more than you. But it’s still good advice.
  10. Few things in life are greater than putting on a brand new pair of socks.
  11. Love.
  12. Some people are just fucking assholes. Fuck those assholes.
  13. Don’t literally fuck the assholes in the previous one. Just metaphorically fuck them.
  14. A fresh cup of coffee can make a big difference to a day. But don’t let it make such a big difference.
  15. Never stop finding the humour in life.
  16. Lust.
  17. To Be Continued…

So there you have it.

It’s not exactly “30 Things I’ve Learned in 30 years”, but “16 Things I’ve Learned in 30 years” just didn’t have the same ring to it.

But for now, it will do.

Here’s to another 30 years, maybe I’ll manage to learn a few more things by then.

You’ve just read 30 Things I’ve Learned in 30 Years.

In which, 9 years ago, I wrote 651 words about life and I covered topics, such as: birthdays .