I once knew a woman who said “Let them eat cake!” or something like that. Actually I didn’t know her, it was Marie Antoinette whom as we all know didn’t live when I lived. I live now and she’s… well… pretty dead last time I checked. She also never actually said “Let them eat cake!”.
So all of that were lies. Delicious lies. Except for the cake part. There is cake, would you like to see it?
So yeah. Now I’m officially older than I was yesterday. Though to be fair, I am going to be older than I am today tomorrow. And so on and so forth. I don’t feel particularly wiser but I do feel older. Waking up this morning was quite a shock to the — my — system as it dawned on me that “Woe is me, I’m so old!”
How old am I? I woke up this morning with a blistering migraine but not because I had been out the night before, partying like the animal I could be. No, I had a migraine because I had forgotten to drink a sufficient amount of water yesterday, like the drying up walking corpse that I actually am. So I have resigned to being older than I would like to be, as we all inevitably have to at one point or another.
Still not going to ze gym though.
Yesterday I made a grandiose promise that there would be cake. Well, for me at least. I never — technically — promised you any cake at all. But I feel like I boasted quite a lot about this awesome cake to be, with its 29 candles, so I thought I should at the very least give you a picture of it. The packaging said to place each candle 10 cm apart from the next one.
“Bah! Humbug!” I say. “Fire hazard, my ass!”