The following event(s) will begin on 13th May. All responsible parties have been notified in accordance with the importance of their involvement. Let the record show that the initial commencing date for the deprecation was 1st April. This was pushed back to 9th April to not correlate with, what is colloquially referred to as, April Fools. Let the record show that this secondary date was pushed back again for reasons which remain unclear—though internally we’re blaming the Dickhead.
Begin deprecation notice.
Date and time of deprecation
From 2021-05-13T00:00:00Z (01:00 BST) to 2021-06-13T00:00:00Z (01:00 BST).
Location of deprecation
Essex, United Kingdom.
Again, it has been noted that the impact of this work will resonate across the globe because, again, that’s, “how websites work.”
Type of deprecation
Alteration of data or computer system, hereby referred to as; Making Topics their own content type. Amendum; hereby referred to as the Great Deprecation.
Person(s) involved in the deprecation
Carlos Eriksson, hereby referred to as; Dickhead.
Will person(s) be injured due to deprecation?
Physically, no. Emotionally, probably.
If, Yes, please attach separate sheet with the names, addresses and contact details of the injured.
Sensitivity of data
Data is part of long-term information architecture.
Chain of events
Dickhead revised the content model for Notes and made an action point that he was going “Add Topics field” to the new content model for Notes. In doing so, he set in motion a chain of events he is now referring to as the Great Deprecation—yes, it has been noted that the propensity for drama is really rather unnecessary.
Impact of deprecation
Do we really need to? Sigh. Fine.
The Great Deprecation will result in the complete loss of all historical Topics, as currently reside in the resource location /topics. Furthermore, these Topics are, what is colloquially referred to as, “tagged” in Journal entries. These references will be removed to prevent returning missing resources, what is colloquially referred to as, 404 Page not found.
All historical Topics will cease to be updated in the interim pending their return in the new form.
There are currently 226 Topics. 121 Topics appear across more than 1 entry. 105 Topics only appear in a single entry. The phrase ‘/topics/’ itself returns 17 matches across 11 files.
Duration of deprecation
Reason for duration
Dickhead has requested that it is noted that this task is, “complicated” and will “take time”. And that additionally, he does not wish to “fuck it up”.
Dickhead has requested that it is noted, that his mother, will hopefully not visit the /topics during The Great Deprecation.
Consequences following the deprecation
Topics will become Subjects.
Historial data will be reviewed for relevance to new information architecture. New references will be added to all relevant and future content models, including but not limited to Notes, Journal entries, Books, Photos, Audio, and Video. Names of content models are subject to change.
Any historical references from Journal entries which are deemed still relevant will be remapped to the new Subjects model and restored. Additionally, an automated scan will be conducted to verify that no references are returning missing resources, what is colloquially referred to as, 404 Page not found.
Dickhead will personally be held responsible and accountable for verifying and addressing these in the Great After-Deprecation.
End of deprecation notice.